12:49 PM 3/19/2006
Textual Excerpts
MY RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY VS. SECULAR PSYCHOLOGY
From Jesus and the angels (not directly)
Written in the Oratory Church-Holy Family Church, Toronto, Canada: Friday, March 7th, 1997.
Please Lord Jesus make me whole,
Fill me til my very soul,
Rises from the earth so long,
Resting peaceful in your calm.
Take us all to heaven to stay,
On that great and fateful day.
All my trials and sinfulness,
Wipe away by your caress.
Do not note the wrong I've done,
Choose me freely as thy son.
Mystery of Christ surround me,
Thine arms of glory wrap around me.
Truth and Justice are your standard,
Mercy be your Word commanded.
Mercy finds and keeps forever,
Rule of God confounds the clever.
Simple hearts in heaven's glow,
Transport children from below.
All to rest in love for ever,
Joy of God's love ceasing never.
MY REPLY AND REFUTATION TO THE PSYCHOMETRIST FRANK ROBINSON'S CRITIQUE AND VIEWS ON MY EXPERIENCES
[Frank Robinson is my psychometrist who has been my friend for 18 years now (June, 2000). I see him one hour, once a week, to this day. By the way this is his real name and identity.
He is a very kind person, generous and inevitably selflessly, other-oriented. He is genuine, quite bright and his overriding characteristics are compassion and mercy.
He belongs to a small, basically Christian Church, but he does not share my church's teaching on hell and damnation. He feels that everyone is saved and that no one is lost because God's love and mercy are infinite (apocatastasis).
My own insistence on Catholic teaching, the bible and the witness of the saints he accepts for me! Also, he is a syncretist.
He mixes teachings of other faiths with Christianity, notably those of Islam, Hinduism and Buddhism, such as reincarnation in the latter two.
These teachings are by definition, not Christian teachings. Also, he feels the devil is not or should not be a factor.
We part company on these points, but our relationship remains warm and from my perspective, satisfyingly intimate.
Frank's views:
It is a complex question. The answer is not easily accounted for. Some of the phenomenon are undoubtedly auditory, visual or somatic hallucinations. [Would you Frank,know the difference between a saints visions and feelings and a clients so called "hallucinations???"---Fess-up Frank!!! [Even he can see some validity in my experiences.
Note the use of the word "some".in HIS preceding sentence R.D.] These phenomena are hallucinations, because they occur outside of the normally accepted sensory pathways. [Mystical experiences are outside normally accepted sensory pathways R.D..]
A number of the ideas surrounding the illusions would be classified as being delusional.[Or not explained by conventional thinking - R.D.]
[Frank's views again.]
For example, some influences are drawn from objective reality: ie. a turn of the head influencing an event in the environment are without any basis in reality, according to the normal mode of perceiving and thinking.
[This phenomena can be easily explained as a mystical experience. It is not unusual or isolated. In the normal situation, it is bizarre. To the mystic, it is an action of the Holy Spirit. R.D.]
These experiences are considered to be examples of a disordered mind in the psychiatric sense. [Wrong - they are mystical. The psychiatric sense is often severely prejudiced against religion and "irrational and unexplained phenomenon" "I think Freud was disordered." R.D.]
Medication is provided to help ease the severity of these disturbances.
[Not these "disturbances" but a recognized chemical imbalance..[quote psychiatry]."I would agree that I have a chemical imbalance, but the phenomena are, and respond as, spiritual. They do not respond to medication at all because they are spiritual.
When my medication is working well, then the "visions" are just as vivid as when there is no medication present, in fact much clearer.R.D.]
However, [Frank's opinion] psychiatry and its theories are not able to compass or give directions to the total structure of the psyche or the mind.
There is a grey area where events of a para-normal nature do not fit into the traditional psychiatric mould.
One of the ideas is - ego syntonicity. Is the effect of the experiences constructive or destructive to the personality?
This may be simplistic, but can be useful, for the saint or the mystic often will have experiences of this nature, and this does not make him/her any less functional in the world (or ego-syntonic).
It is empirical because you can observe how well a person can function. [But one may be pre - occupied, absent - minded, in religious ecstasy, or oppressed R.D.]
One of the criteria, to determine whether experiences are psychiatric or paranormal ego- syntonic ones, is to be able to question the degree of truth they purport.
Can one be objective about one's experiences - are they true? The possibility that these are not true is always present.
Any skilled and sympathetic observation from an outside observer (spiritual or psychological) is good.
[Does the observer have the same mode and tools for observing? R.D.] Are they able to be objective to the person's experiences?
[But, can the observer see or hear everything the mystic does? Does not the observer live in a different world - the mundane world?]
And who is to say that the mundane world is more valid than the mystical world?
What are your criteria for judging? Are the scales weighted more in favour of the mundane world?
The problem is that you just don't understand because you haven't experienced God directly. Believe me, you would be an instant convert if you did.
And is it sickness or is it God? Well. If we can agree that God exists, then WHERE IS HE ? DOES HE HAVE ANY CONTACT WITH EARTH - EVER?
DOES GOD VISIT OR INFLUENCE THE EARTH ? DOES HE INFLUENCE US, DIRECTLY??? R.D.] Frank again.
If the experiences don't stand up to rational investigation and can't be explained in any sensible manner, even if the parameters are different from the observer(the person listening), then the experiences may be delusional.
For example, most people don't accept paranormal phenomenon, but it is accepted by some,so there is a wide latitude of acceptance here. [Would a Saint's visions of Jesus or Mary be considered delusional?]
[I think that I should warn you that by asking that question and by how you answer it you are indicating whether you have a fundamentally religious, specifically Christian view of life or the universe. - R.D.]
[Frank's views] R.D. Laing - mental illness is a state of incongruence between the meaning worlds of self and other (people) and in this view, can be looked upon as a disturbance in communication with the cause or seat of the disturbance, lying in the inner cognitive and feeling structure of the other.
There has to be order to the personality and the ability to communicate. R.D. Laing thinks the disturbed intra-psychic process in the so-called patient is to be accepted and may be a sane solution to an insane situation. (A non-judgmental viewpoint R.D.)
There is the need to communicate and relate in common forms, gestures and meanings for the sake of daily living and inhabiting a common world. [But the mystics world is common to him / her and God's world.]
In the so called mentally ill, there are also often disturbances of feeling; eg -no feeling, lability (feeling swings), pervasive and euphoric moods (mania), depression or aggressiveness.
So (in Robert's case) there is a mixture of mental illness and a mixture of experience that is probably valid. It is sometimes very hard to tell when the illness is there and when the mysticism is there.
[ Could that be because there is a lot of mysticism present - IE. mystery. --R.D.].
MY FURTHER REBUTTAL AND REFUTATION OF MY PSYCHOMETRIST FRANK ROBINSON
The ego-dystonic or performance debilitating effect most often presented by Frank is the presence of Mr. D. or the devil. Frank says this causes instability, depression, and other negative effects, which are dystonic and are therefore indicative of an unhealthy spirituality and illness.
I admit they are present, but only with the knowledge of Almighty God. Also, they drew or forced me into a closer relationship with the Most Holy Trinity, (Jesus in particular) as a compensating mechanism.
I would present the jury with the example of Sister Josefa Menendez who was plagued by the devil, until she died as a result of the fiend's terrors and actions.
She is a candidate for sainthood. According to Frank she is ego-dystonic. In addition, St. Catherine of Sienna was oppressed by the evil one often.
Indeed, most contemplatives are occupied with fighting evil from time to time in the form of the devil.
Tuesday July 2nd, 1991
[The explanations of Frank Robinson, my psychometrist as to why he finds certain types of my phenomena suspect from a mental health perspective are, in fact, suspect themselves.
In the first place, the devil was only involved in approximately less than 20% of the occurrences, as I presented them to him at the beginning of our sessions. The experiences of the devil he considers ego-dystonic or a sign of illness.What about Job??
As I have pointed out elsewhere, the presence of the devil may be seen as a sign of, even in fact, some sanctity, if we consider he often only afflicts those he thinks may escape him. I am not playing tic-tac-toe with the devil.
He wants to destroy me, because I belong to Jesus Christ. This is not the sign of a disordered mind, it is an endorsement of my spirituality. It is realistic spiritually.
God is the one who allows the devil to occasionally plague me. God does this with full knowledge of the total situation, locally and cosmically. He acts only for my own good and the common GOOD.
He always leaves a way out for us. So if the devil is present, accept it. Don't accept the devil but accept that he is there.
God either wants him there or permits him to be there and for a purpose. Fight him and resist him until "he flees". Frank basically wants to pretend that the devil doesn't exist OR that he can't come into my world.
The other incidence of so called mental illness that Frank mentions, "the turn of a head", is a simple case of a prayer thought by me, triggering a movement by a very visible and powerful Holy Spirit that caused the other person involved to move their head.
If one accepts that prayer is sometimes effective and that God can influence human events, movements, and even thoughts, then is it too much to ask that Frank and the reader accept my observations on this single isolated occurrence?
He just can't bring himself to believe for more than a few hours at a time. But I have had him believing on many occasions and he has often sat spellbound and entranced, as I told him my Truth about God.
But he doesn't understand for long and he seems unable to change his judgements. Frank has listened carefully, indeed at times with rapt attention, to my almost endless stories of spiritual experience. He has been generally accepting of my world view, more as time went on and I gathered expert opinion of a world-class calibre to back up my experiences.
My illness is more affective (or a mood disorder such as manic-depressive) than schizophrenic. Hence it usually does not consist in delusions or hallucina tions, unless I am seriously ill.
[And these can be common to a mood disorder like manic-depression as well as the more traditional thought disorder called schizophrenia.]
The normal mode of mystical, supernatural experiences characteristic of my prayer life is one of calm, integrity, [the experiences are easily integrated] peace and unity. [Indeed the Spirits of the All-Holy Trinity effect the integration by Their own powers.]
When I am ill, it is as though the mirror of God's experiences is shattered; there is disorganization, great tension and conflict.
I exhibit great personality changes with violent emotional upheavals, agitated behaviour, great releases of psychic and / or nervous energy and NO ABILITY TO PRAY.[So sickness negates these experiences. They are healthy.]
No! My experiences are better seen as real and valid as examples of mystical phenomena. Now granted, when Mr. D. (or the dirty old devil) gets his teeth in me, I get some distress, but it has never been treated as an illness by the staff at my hospital. They just recommend some hot milk to get me to sleep.
In almost all cases of mystical experience that I have had, I have been taking large doses of medication (which are not responsible for the experiences by the way).
I have usually only experienced God when the medication is balanced and effective. I experienced God in these ways (Light and Energy) from the ages of 3 years in the playpen to 23 years from time to time, and I didn't start to use meds until I was 23 years old.
So they aren't caused by meds. Similarly, I didn't have my breakdown until I was approximately 18 years old, so they aren't caused by overt malignant illness.
In short, the phenomena or experiences are not caused by the illness or the medication. They are restricted, inhibited, indeed totally obscured more and more, by increasingly acute illness. The medication calms down the arena enough for the players to take the stage.
The fact that it is secular psychology that is judging a religious event or subject must not be lost sight of. Frank has a professional reputation as well as a job to protect.
He MUST, I strongly suspect, comment on my experiences from a secular world view that excludes or marginalizes God, much less Jesus and the Holy Spirit, and that is strictly empirical to the Christian world. (I hope I don't misjudge him).
It has its own values, however perverted, and endorses concepts such as Freudian explanations or interpretations that, while they may have some basis in a secular world, hardly uplift the individual in his search for a better attitude towards himself, others, or a God-centred world and value system.
[I feel Frank's professional self, that is, in relationship to his collegues and his profession, is probably much influenced by them. He is quite religious, but I am sure that the demands of his profession over - ride this.]
Frank has helped me a lot and I believe that we have both learned a lot from each other. His persistent advice, "don't resist the evil (the devil), when he comes upon you - just let him pass through", was intended in the bible to deal with people, not the devil and flies in the teeth of the Christian admonition to "Resist the devil and he will flee from you".
Frank refuses to back down on this point. His idea, that there is no one in hell is wishful thinking. But I know that it is an easy frame of mind for the staff to get into. I might have done the same if I were him.
Frank is a very humane person with a true concern for his patients. However, he has consistently told me things that show, that when push comes to shove and either he or I are in between a rock and a hard place vis-a-vis hospital policy, that he is a company man, that his allegiances only go within the parameters of the therapeutic process, as outlined by the hospital policy.
I feel for him because he is a potentially great human being and he does some good work. But he is hamstrung by his circumstances. Still, he does very well. I love him like a Christian brother.
[Frank tended to look for illness while I was looking for God. His search was for pathology and he saw it in the middle of my experiences of God.
If I may say it, his eye was too jaded to see the truth. Enough said on these subjects -just a few points to close].
The question must inevitably arise. "What happens when a man (or woman) is led by God and Graced by God to embark upon a program of divinization, IF THAT PERSON IS MENTALLY ILL?"
There can be no doubt that I am a well person with a disability, mentally ill without drugs, but able to live an almost normal life with the use of medical drugs, with the exception of my inability to stand the stress of a full-time job and also a tendency to the odd, short breakdown.
[But God - Father, Son and Holy Spirit has blessed me with a plethora of their Presence and Graces and called me. "This day I have begotten you." This is how it has on one occasion been expressed (in a paraphrase of Scripture about Jesus.)
I have been led on, chided, chastened, humbled, engaged, (spiritually married, once to Jesus), exalted over and over again while I proceed from mere undeveloped human to divinized [sometimes incorrectly called deified], small "g" "god". This journey is the subject matter of this book.]
[To deny what has obviously happened and is documented on these pages as having happened is ridiculous. The conclusion is inescapable. The mentally ill are capable of profound spiritual growth and may embark on a program leading to the highest levels of religious experience, to the Godhead and even to becoming "gods" themselves.]
[Now to get back to Frank. When I first wrote this passage in 1986 -87, I was afraid of being ill, of being accused, and of looking foolish. I had not experienced all the wonderful things that have happened to me since then. I apologize for the weak nature of my writing.]
[I hope the last few pages have been more satisfactory -dated 9:25 P.M., Tuesday, July 2, 1991.]
Frank also cannot accept some of the supernatural character of the phenomenon, good or evil. He cannot see how it could be valid or rational realistic, so he rejects it. He "can't see God".
Suffice it to say that God's ways are not our ways and truth is stranger than fiction. There is more unseen than seen! However, if Frank doesn't see it, it doesn't exist.
There is a very definite strong possibility that the omnipresent meaning that is in my environment and the Light that floods my world from a great variety of sources in the environment [none of them tangible] are from God.
Is my illness not a Grace from God? ["Everything is Grace", one saint said.] I must face the possibility that it is not a Grace from God [this undermines the whole basis of my soul - mind and emotional being].
Do you know if it is sickness or Spirit? Let us discuss this in a great deal of detail and with as much discernment as we can. I want to be honest. I can be honest in my reporting. I already have been.
But my interpretation has a bias [in favour of the experiences of the saints. Frank has a bias too, in favour of secular psychology]. [I would swear on anything sacred, if we were allowed to do so, that I am not "faking" or pretending that I have these experiences.
It would ruin my integrity - I couldn't do it and live with myself. But I think now that it is time to take it to the world because it is true, beautiful and Grace filled.
Also, the world needs to be stood on its ear to know that God still lives and moves around and through His people]. So it is not a way of having made it, from the ego of a loser or from someone who is a failure in the world's eyes and wants to appear successful or important.
A friend of mine recently said that a schizophrenic's world is charged with meaning. Meanings that other people don't have. Do you think that is what my phenomena are Frank? I feel as though I am mutilating myself.
I sense futility in my life a lot of the time. Failure is the rule rather than success from my point of view. This decaying physical world brings that feeling on, I think. Also, my illness crippled my attempts at a normal life in some ways.
This is true of my prayer life too. Where is it all leading??? Or is the goal the journey, and not the end of the journey? I enjoy praying very much, but what if it is all sickness and illusion? I can't take that thought. [Still, there is almost total integrity in my reporting].
The practice of prayer in my life is dull and my head feels dead - the practice is poor.
But the faith remains strong - so does the hope and the love. Indeed, the love of my brothers and sisters seems stronger, because I am not so other-worldly concerned with self and God.
I suffered under the devil - "should we not also accept evil things from God" (Job 2:10). I emerged to peace and I saw the Light of the city of Heaven, the great city. I sensed its presence. I was filled with overwhelming joy. I was shown there a laurel crown, but I was not given it.
I read in The Ladder Of Perfection that the devil can duplicate the Lord. Is it possible I am at the mercy of Mr. D. because I accept almost any phenomenon, that doesn't appear harmful, as being from the Lord? Could I be totally misled? I have had a few times, a thought that perhaps the whole thing was from Mr. D.
My feeling is that I sacrifice a lot of companionship, time, and peace of mind by literally driving myself towards my obsessive goal of doing the right thing to get results - to please the Lord. I have no other recurring thought that comes as often as 1/10 the time, when I set out to please the Lord. Is it good, responsible, natural? [No matter, I must go on].
I get (see) abundant Graces at Mass and in front of the Blessed Sacrament, but not many in prayer at home, it seems.
I am reading Walter Hilton's, "The Ladder Of Perfection." It frightens me. I can't take it seriously, although I want to. I am so inadequate, so weak, so egotistical, lazy, and weak-willed. I don't think I could carry it out. I want to, though. I don't know if I could stay close that long. What about my job, [my 16 hour / month part - time job], my family, my friends. I want to, though. I said that three times.
I have been given the revelation that God these days is shaking me, the way a dog shakes a rat - I wonder if this is true???
I have renounced my parents and my brother, all my friends, my brothers and sisters in Christ, my relations, my enemies, my [former] girlfriends, my joys; all without knowing why I was doing it, doing it unconsciously.
Now two weeks later, I have crucified the world to myself and myself to the world again not knowing what I was doing. I offered my soul to the world the way Jesus offered His body and blood, to add my own part to Jesus action, so that all men might be saved.
A form of spiritual crucifixion, dying for others - OK ???? [Obviously, a completely different act from that of Jesus but in union with Him, perhaps efficacious in some way.]"...
It cannot be affirmed that all mental maladies; are of a spiritual nature or origin. But neither can it be affirmed that demonic influences have no connection with mental maladies.
At least some hallucinations may be a vision of the spiritual world, not in its luminous but in its darker aspect." [What do you say now, Frank -- jab, jab???]
In truth, I have had numerous occasions when I have been assaulted by such visions - eyes closed with images of people or wild beasts in violent or perverse poses, temptations from the evil one.
These are always when I am outside a feeling of well being, serenity or Grace. There is absolutely no doubt that they are demonic. On the other hand, God's Light is more compelling, loving, meaningful, subtle, active, intelligent, creative, constructive, supportive, and moving towards union.
, . We will see. I lead a somewhat normal life in contact with an equal number of well and ill people in a variety of positions in society.
Needless to say, I will never tackle a big social justice project, for instance. I am happier being with God and this is much easier for me. I still feel uncomfortable with people who look down on those less fortunate than themselves - the latter being chiefly in this case, ME!!!.
I feel clumsy in society sometimes, usually when people find out I am or have been ill. [I feel quite self-conscious. You would too with a history like mine.]
[I use the mysticism (the Presence of God) to overcome the illness, but it takes a lot of rest and solitude - its the only thing I can do well.] So I am ill. But can anyone say I am not a mystic.
MENTAL ILLNESS AND SAINTHOOD
The following is a quote which justifies both myself and this book. According to father Peter Fransen S.J., It is quite possible and indeed it may in some way be normative that many saints are in fact ill mentally or perhaps physically, although the obverse is not usually true:
That if you are ill, you are a saint. My heart fills with joy and love toward father Peter for his inspired approach toward the subject of sainthood and the mentally ill. PRAISE GOD.
In Divine Grace and Man, (Desclee Company, New York, Tournai, Paris, Rome; l962) P. ll3, Father Peter Fransen S.J. writes eloquently about the church's recognition of some broken people she calls saints or who are at least elevated in status by the church.
He says "The providential design of raising canonized saints in the church, according to the needs of the times, has been dwelt upon by many writers in recent years.
Now in the case of persons undeniably privileged by Grace, but psychologically disordered through no faults of theirs, spiritual oddities or morbid character traits would prevent them from being held up as models for imitation in the church.
Nonetheless psychological disturbances are not necessarily obstacles to Grace."
He writes, "God's ways are wonderful. He may, when He wants, destine some interiorly distraught souls to the sublime, if harrowing, vocations of imitating Christ forsaken and desolate in the garden of Gethsemane; and this "in spite", or rather by means of their shattered psychic condition.
The essential requirement for holiness is the same for all: a faithful "yes" to the call of God, manifest in the particular concrete situation of existence which His wisdom has chosen for each one; the case of the psychotic man is no exception to the rule." (p.113).
ANIMAL
THE VISION OF HEAVEN OF ST.THEOPHANE THE RECLUSE
{Written---Early July, 1992} FRIEND STEVIE, 1953 DIGGING WORMS, I SAW JESUS IN AGONY {OUR SINS!} ON AN EXQUISITE, ORNATE GOLDEN CROSS SURROUNDED BY GREAT YELLOW WHITE LIGHT, CONFIRMED AS A BELEIVING CHRISTIAN FROM THAT TIME ON, DIDN'T TELL TOO MANY SOULS BUT NO ONE WANTED TO BELIEVE A LITTLE BOY, STEVIE DIDN'T SEE JESUS, MENTAL ILLNESS DIDN'T START UNTIL 1962-3 WHEN I WAS 16-17 YEARS OLD, VISUAL GRACE AND STREAMS OF LIVING WATERS, I SAW WITH MY OWN EYES 1951-1960 AND BEFORE 1951 IN LONDON ENGLAND, JESUS SAID "YOU SAW THEM THOUSANDS OF TIMES" BUT MEMORIES BEING WHAT THEY ARE I DON'T REMEMBER MUCH.
It happened sometime around 1953, I had a tiny, little friend Stevie, a boy who lived on Holmwood Ave. in Ottawa, (the capital of Canada). We were in his backyard digging in his family's compost heap looking for worms with which to go fishing. We were in the neighbourhood of 7 years old.
Something caught my eye! I turned and saw Jesus on an exquisitely, ornate, golden cross some 15 - 20 feet high and about 50 - 60 feet away surrounded by great yellow-white Light... Jesus radiated a great, clear, and clean compassion and my heart began to glow with warmth from the source I knew only as God.
This experience confirmed me in my belief in Jesus, and I was confirmed for sure as a believing Christian from that day onward. By the way, my friend apparently didn't know of the vision. I tried telling a few people, but I guess nobody wanted to believe a little boy. Once more, I was safe, this time from worried parents.
[This was years before the Mystical Marriage and was my first vision of Jesus, in Person, that I can remember. It was the most important highlight of the mystical life that I enjoyed during my early years in Canada. I can't remember much more about my mystical life during this period 1951-60. (My mental illness didn't start until 1962-3 in its acute form). I didn't, in this case, see a realistic cross with a realistic Jesus on it.
The cross was heavily stylized and ornate]. [Jesus was in agony. Our sins!] [I remember seeing many times, visual Grace and the Streams of Living Water with my naked eyes during the period 1951 -- 1960. Jesus just told me to tell you I saw them "thousands of times during this period." I remember lots of these times but who could remember more than a small number out of "thousands." As I remember, it was more or less daily and I thought it was natural, but I didn't tell any one because I didn't want to get "locked up." I always wondered whether anyone else saw things like me. It }{ it was awe - inspiring, spiritually edifying and beautiful}{ . I just remember the highlights.
THE VISION OF HEAVEN OF SAINT THEOPHANE THE RECLUSE---I WOULDN'T ATTEMPT OR DREAM OF PARAPHRASING OR WRITING A PRECIS OF THIS AWE-INSPIRING IMAGE OF HEAVEN THAT ST. THEOPHANE WROTE WHILE LIVING A RETIRED LIFE FOR AN EXTENDED PERIOD OF TIME IN RUSSIA. YOU "MUST" READ IT--IT IS AT THE HEART OF ORTHODOXY AND THE TRUTH.
St. Theophane the Recluse describes the most inspiring description of heaven I have ever read ***which is in agreement with the teachings of the Prophets, the Person of Jesus Himself and the Apostles as well as the early church fathers and other lesser luminaries.*** He is no crackpot this guy. He received it as a vision from the Lord. I know nothing more about it. Here it is:
St. Theophane the Recluse (1815 - the 1890's approximately) wrote the following vision which he received from the Lord after he had retired from his position of Archbishop of Tambov.
"All Heaven is boundless light. The Tri - hypostatic, Tri - illuminated Deity is hidden by the impassible divine light which can only be mentally contemplated. But God the incarnate Word, although He shines with light of an intensity which created light never possessed, yet His light is accessible to the created eyes and is received according to the perfection of the creature who looks on Him. Our Lady, the Theotokos is nearest.
Farther away are the Apostles and the Prophets, who were God - enlightened even here on the earth. After them come the secondary depositaries of Divine Revelation. Then all the saints in their various degrees: martyrs, ascetics, just men from all states and conditions of life. All are inundated with light coming out from the face of our Lord and Saviour, a light beyond all description.
Below the saints are those who repented but had no time to purify themselves and are purified by the action of the grace of penance and of the prayer of the Church of the saints perfected and glorified in Heaven. The light here is received according to the degree of purification, from a hardly noticable twilight to the full light." (St. Theophane the Recluse, }{ Pisme k raznym licam} . . . [letters to various Persons on various Subjects of Faith and Life]
An excerpt from an email to Mrs. Spats--1997-8 approx.---Well the Divine Light is almost always white and ethereal, except when it is in the form Of the Living Waters and then it is mixed with black the contrast of bubbling along.
MY FRIENDS ILLNESS, I SAID " KEEP ME POSTED IF YOU DIE", CHARACTERISTICS OF THE LIGHT, TRUE AND FALSE LIGHT, A TRICKY BUSINESS, CONVERSATIONS WITH MRS. SPATS, MY BEAUTIFUL SIGNATURE FILE.
Back to the Light. Also it is sometimes very seldom of differing shades of yellow ranging up to a rich gold colour. I can almost always tell in calm conditions whether the (l)LIGHT is of God by just knowing but I still have to check and sometimes I am wrong which keeps me honest.
Unfortunately it can be mixed to varying degrees with the aweful false light which resembles it so closely and can be sensed to be false and will also when it speaks --tell lies-- which can lead to a human tragedy if you listen to this form of false light.
It is always debilitating to talk about the false light because it draws it like a fly in the reverse of ordinary physical light. And it is destructive--it causes great strain on my mind like now.
It is created from the father of lies and lucifer had this great FALSE light which HE USES TO TRY TO DECEIVE THE SAINTS AND I am convinced he shares with his followers I know not the ways of demons and that is to not think or talk about them unless they show first.
It can choose a person who is enlightened and pervert them IE get them "listening" to it and weave a tale of supposed revelation that is supposed from the false light's point of view to CREATE A NEW {FALSE} RELIGION.
This is in my and most Christian mystics in my and our opinion how new religions and cults get started. It is a very sad story and I am weeping now as I tell it to you.
This is the light of the non Christian mystics and it confuses everyone very much when it says something contrary to what Scripture says and I don't know about corporeal visions of a human being in the flesh --
I think I've only had a few of those--I'm drawing a blank here I remember seeing someone who was "supposed to be me at a great pillar at a temple and I can't remember although the answer is in the book how I discerned this vision. But it was visual not corporeal IE I couldn't have touched "myself in the vision--from outside the vision---IE where I was" if I tried to.
Too much talk of falseness and not enough today of truth and fidelity and right reason and my girlfriend from age 12-19? commented after I told her today: I was raving to her about what you were doing for me with the page and all, that you were "very faithful" and that she asked if {you} survived any blowups and I said yes that you had gone through several and just left me to cool off and then when I came slinking back like a rat to apologise with my tail between my legs you just said something like "Oh! I'm used to old curmugeons!!!" Then I said you "are or appear to be rock solid."
The following two paragraphs are taken from my signature file from my email program 1997-1998: Robert Lind Defries invites you to become a God as in a Son of God(See St. John of the Cross See also "The Experience of the Divine Light and Energies" "The Spiritual Journal of Robert Lind Defries," by myself.)
The infolding involving assimilation of the Spirit of God, containing ineffably the Person of Jesus Christ, into the soul, mind, heart, body, head, senses, and Spirit is Theosis or the Christification of the human person into the Image of God, the occasion of the transformation of the soul into the Likeness of God. This is divinization or the process of becoming an eternal dependant God:by "partaking of (Christ's) Holiness" (Hebrews 12:10), and by "partaking of the Divine Nature." (2nd Peter, 1:4) RLD.
Robert Lind Defries
STILL A GIRL UNTIL YOU HAVE SOME CHILDREN, THEN THE AVERAGE WOMAN FINDS HER FULFILLMENT, BUT YOU "MRS SPATS" ARE A VERY VERY GOOD GIRL.
YOU HAVE A LOT OF LOVE AND GOODNESS IN YOUR HEART AND MIND, AND SOUL ESPECIALLY, CHANGE TOPICS: ONE OF MY FORMER GIRLFRIEND'S AFFAIR WITH HER PSYCHIATRIST DUMPING ME IN THE PROCESS WHEN I WAS A YOUNG MAN.
AH THE JOYS OF BEING CUCKOLDED--LIKE MANY SAINTS INCLUDING ST. AUGUSTINE AND ST FRANCIS OF ASSISSI AND I THINK ST. FRANCIS XAVIER, AND OTHER PILLARS OF THE CHURCH, I WAS NO INNOCENT AT THAT TIME EITHER, UNDERGOING A VERY RADICAL CONVERSION A FEW YEARS LATER IN THE THROES OF MY INTENSE SUFFERING FOR THE SINS OF MY YOUTH.
A reflection on women and girls sent to my email friend: Dear "little" "B", In my opinion and being a bit arrogant I will go out on a limb and say you are still a girl until you have some or a child(ren). Because you still sound like a girl and when I am too hard on you {which is a reflection of my condition and not due to a desire to hurt you premeditated from a pure mind} you "sound" like a little girl which is to say that to my mother i sometimes even often sound like a little boy--perhaps at times to you too. Anyway having established that you are at times a girl IE 16-17 years of age at least I am getting to my point you are in the Lord Jesus Christ a very, very, good, good, girl. You have a lot of love and goodness inside your heart and mind and soul especially which constantly reaches out to God and seeks sojourn with him.
I am no judge of your soul because you don't talk to me at all hardly, about the state of your soul but I know your web page and your interest in things spiritual (even my book) and I know you are the property of Jesus Christ in the Father and the Fathers' Spirit.
My girlfriend said to me last time that we had talked that she had not told me about her affair with her psychiatrist that she didn't tell me because she was terrified of my mind and I still can't see how that could be but maybe you're terriffied of my mind too??? Is that true??? And believe me other than a mild normal temptation I HAVE NO DESIGNS ON YOU WHATSOEVER.
A MASS TYPICAL OF MANY OF MY MASSES WHEN I AM WELL AND IN A STATE OF GRACE--- I GO TO CONFESSION BEFORE EACH MASS TO STAY IN A STATE OF GRACE, THIS MASS IN PARTICULAR WAS VERY HEAVY WITH THE PRESENCE OF THE BLESSED VIRGIN MARY AND THE MOST HOLY TRINITY AND MANY THINGS HAPPENED {SEE BELOW} THE SUPERNATURAL, WE BELIEVE IN THINGS "SEEN AND UNSEEN" {SEE THE NICENE CREED}, IN THE SOUNDS OF THE WORLD--THE VOICE OF GOD, FOR ME AND OTHERS IN THE LOCAL OR HEAVENLY SENSE, PARTHENOGENISIS--THE CONCEPTION BY THE POWER OF THE LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT OF THE LORD JESUS CHRIST BY THE OVERSHADOWING OF HIS HEAVENLY LORD GOD THE FATHER.
Here follows an explanation of the passage following this sentence the explanation being in brackets. MARY RADIATED ME GRACE FROM HER STATUE TO NIGHT (I can see with my diivinizied or grace filled eyes the action of Grace at times and the movement of SOME of the activities of the Holy Spirit.
A good mass for me is totally supernatural as this one was tonight) AND THE PRIEST CAME TO THE FACT THAT THERE WAS A SAINT IN THE ROOM and he was not I don't think jealous but he put on the Presence of God the Father and tested me suficiently and found out i was a saint of the Lord Jesus Christ he being a very holy Man AND IT WAS ME AT WHICH POINT HE PUT ON THE MANTLE OF GOD AND TOOK ME BY STORM AND THERE WERE SEVERAL INFERANCES CLEAR TO ALL ABOUT MY CRUCIFIXION( I take the place spiritually, (by the power of God) of the Most Blessed and Supernaturally All-Powerful Son of God) (most likely due to the suffering of my illness; being the usual result of my illness) IN SOME SIMILAR SPIRITUAL MODES PARALLEL TO JESUS LIFE -- WORDS OF ACCEPTANCE IN HEAVEN BY AND OF MY LONG LOST LOVE AND I, EACH OF THE OTHER-( I had dedicated the consecrations at the start of the mass to the two of us in heaven ) -VISITING AND ALL AT EACH OTHERS "MANSIONS" (she and I will be united in heaven at the time appointed by God in heaven) AND I WAS IDENTIFIED AS JESUS ALTHOUGH THAT IS (meant as) A DEGREE OF RELATED NESS AND A SIMILARITY TO JESUS. BUT IT'S ALL SO DISTASTFUL, UNPLEASANT, AND DIFFICULT,--PHYSICALLY PAINFUL, AND FILLED WITH THE EFFORTS OF THE HEAVY PLAYERS CONTROLLING THE ROOM SPIRITUALLY, AND DOMINATING WHICH IS TO SAY IT IS A CONTEST OF SPIRITUAL WILLS ( I am sure you have experienced this) WHEN THE PROTAOGONIST OTHER THAN YOURSELF OR MYSELF, HAS AN AGENDA THAT IS OUT OF SYNC WITH THE WILL OF THE LORD (the reader of the lessons is the sinful protagonist that i speak of here) AND WHEN THE WILL OF THE LORD IS PRESENT IT IS SWEETNESS AND LIGHT AND HARMONY AND HUMILITY AND I GET THIS MODE WITH FR "D" AND HE IS SO HUMBLE WHILE A CERTAIN PRIEST MANIPULATES AND ORCHESTRATES THE LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT INTO DRAMATICALLY ACTIVE EXPRESSIONS OF THE WILL OF GOD.
So Mrs.Spats., I admit that this is a wild passage and I can't remember much of it taking place today except the highlights---perhaps I am ill except for the last several decades I have been able at various times to see the Lord the Holy Spirit and Perhaps Jesus I am not sure now about Jesus and He (They) tell me the most incredibly true and beautiful and profound things. This is often the case that the things they tell me and the things I see them telling me in spiritual not human and divine not created Words and visions are so ineffable and so sublime that I am nearly bowled off my feet and begin to doubt my sanity for only the odd person has the ability to discern the supernatural WHICH IS ALL AROUND US. "I BELIEVE IN WHAT IS SEEN AND UNSEEN"(THE NICENE CREED) Mrs. Spats, I SEE WHAT IS UNSEEN AND I HEAR IN THE SOUNDS OF THE WORLD, THE VOICE OF GOD FOR ME AND OTHERS IN THE LOCAL OR HEAVENLY SENSE. I guess God came and answered my prayers and yours and My friends and Spiritual Directors for this was an experience so wonderful so magnificent and so rewarding that I will remember it for a long time and hopefully many others will have comparable graces and blessings as well. Well Mrs. Spats. I've shot my bolt my finger is hurting and I will go hopefully you will understand better what happened last night today from this version. Yours sincerely, Robert Defries PS. I'm not sick -- exalted yes and restored at least for a time yes. But sick--no. PPS This went to my friend M.F. too. I have to bash him on the head with the supernatural to get him to open his mind which he will probably refuse to do at this expression of holiness.
A note to a dissident to the following argument: Dear Sir, are you made of something other than DNA. Did your parent's characteristics mutate completely so you bear no ressemblance to them even bio-chemically--by the way there is a biochemical term parthenogenesis that describes how a creature can produce an offspring without the participation of a created mate, the two strings of dna joining to produce in Mary the Mother of God's case the genetic material that formed Jesus' delectable Body His Divinity came from Heaven from the Lord the Holy Spirit who so entered the sanctified womb of the Blessed Mother while the Lord God, the Father of Jesus was the initiator of this Ultimate Sublime Act and "Overshadowed " the event, singular of its type in world history.
SECOND EDITION
Copyright 1982-2003, 1991, 1993, 1995,ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ROBERT LIND DEFRIES, COPYRIGHT 1999-2004 Robert Lind Defries, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
All previous statements about the number and media of copies of the book for download or copy in any media in the years 1986 to the present 11/10/2004 are absolutely declared now null and void. Only the conditions on this page at 11/10/2004 are in effect for the forseeable future
The Experience of the Divine Light and Energies: The Spiritual Journal of Robert Lind Defries was written to reach the largest audience possible. The book-file is FREE and it is not meant that there should be a moral or financial barrier between downloading and keeping a copy of the book by anyone who wishes to do so, especially in cases of need where really present.
The notes took from 1982 to the present 2004 to compile.
May the Glory of God overshadow you, bathing you in its inestimable Pure Light and may your reward in heaven be ever so much greater than you may expect and certainly well above mine {provided I maintain my holiness or grow}. I will pray for you from time to time.
Please, feel free to photocopy or reproduce this book in paper form in small quantities whenever it is necessary for any purpose whatever in keeping with the intent of the book, including personal study, teaching purposes or personal reading but not for profit. It must be used or offerred to the public in a way that preserves the integrity of the book. *******Unfortunately the original printing of the book in paper is out of print but the ISBN NO. and Cataloguing in publication data here is applied and sanctioned for use with the electronic media here displayed and covers downloaded copies of the book and paper copies printed from the files. The ISBN # and the catalogueing in Publication Data apply to the electronic media and printed material copied from the electronic media. It is just as valid as a paper ISBN # etc. In fact the ISBN number has been modified for use in an electronic document.*******
LITERARY DISCLAIMER: This book contains the very occasional use of modified or fictitious names, titles, identities, places, events, and dates on rare occasions, to protect the innocent and the guilty, without implying either.
This book contains the very occasional use of modified or fictitious names, titles, identities, places, events, and dates on rare occasions, to protect the innocent ( and the guilty,) without implying either.
Messages to the author on the internet system are both solicited and appreciated. Thank you for the communication and / or the collaboration or criticism.
Canadian Cataloguing in Publication Data
Defries, Robert Lind, 1946-
The experience of the divine light and energies
The spiritual journal of Robert Lind Defries
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 0-9697192-1-3
1. Mystical union. I. Blake, Andrew, 1952-
II. Title. BT767.7.D44 1993 248.2'2 C93-094180-2
FREE PUBLICATION INFORMATION and LITERARY DISCLAIMER A BOOK OF CHRISTIAN MYSTICISM
Publication Information, TITLE PAGE OF THE BOOK, ISBN NUMBER, CATALOGUING IN PUBLICATION DATA, COPYRIGHT INFO,{Free Christian Book} the ISBN number is issued for computer media and direct printing from file, the book is out of paper print of its small limited edition, but paper copies of the book may be printed no more than 3 by a computer.
This book contains the very occasional use of modified or fictitious names, titles, identities, places, events, and dates on rare occasions, to protect the innocent and the guilty, without implying either.
IT IS FREE but may not be sold. -I have the permission of the Canadian Cataloguing in Publication Dep't to do this, and they provided a special ISBN No.
To effect this and meet international standards and protocol, the copyright is held by the author who is 58 years old.
Thus the years to the end of my life plus 75 years copyright validity and protection should see this interesting book preserved for the longest time until it enters the public domain -- hopefully to find its place in history and letters
SOME REASONS FOR WRITING THIS BOOK, "THE EXPERIENCE OF THE DIVINE LIGHT AND ENERGIES-THE SPIRITUAL JOURNAL OF ROBERT LIND DEFRIES." THE TITLE HAS BEEN CHANGED TO "A BOOK OF CHRISTIAN MYSTICISM"
GOD IN MY LIFE: ONE OR TWO REASONS "WHY"
One of my reasons for writing this book, (this comes as an afterthought) has been to demonstrate how God worked in one person's life, (in my life), and perhaps give some encouragement in the form of an example, in certain ways, to anyone the Holy Spirit speaks to through my writing. I am a very hard person to emulate. First you have to get mentally ill, etc. However, what I am trying to demonstrate throughout the book is:
That GOD LOVES US ALL AND WANTS US ALL IN HEAVEN AND JESUS AND THE TRINITY ARE INFINITELY FORGIVING.!!!
GOD LOVES YOU AS HE LOVES ME. IF HE APPEARS TO LOVE YOU MORE OR LESS PERHAPS IT IS BECAUSE YOU TRY LESS OR HARDER
If He loves me as much as He indicates He does, to me and to you, in the pages of this book, then surely He must love you as much too. He must surely have given or want to give you all the gifts conferred on me, and many more that I haven't even been able to access.
I am sure that God can bestow gifts like these, without the person receiving them being really too aware of receiving them. So if you are a good person, (relatively speaking), you could receive some of these great gifts of God.
I AM HARD TO EMULATE; WHO WOULD CHOOSE OR WANT TO
I am, as I say, hard to emulate. I have a lot of characteristics no one would want--mentally ill - essentially unemployable -voluntarily celibate --perhaps unattractive IE overweight- etc.
But my story for the last 20 years has been one of upward mobility in the spiritual life, of overcoming obstacles and handicaps, of growth and achievement, although at no time did I ever succeed in vanquishing or shedding my illness. I remain a well person with a deeply ingrained disability. My weakness shows itself daily.
So one group that might be able to relate to me is the mentally ill. I hope I have been a good example to them. I have tried to be a good representative for them or us.
The achievements have been great. I think I have done much, much more than I could ever have expected from myself 20 years ago, when I first thought of this book.
I praise God for leading me on the path of this success, and I thank Him with all my heart, soul, mind and body for the gifts He has made to me throughout my life. May there be many more for you and myself, both.
Thank - you for indulging me with your time, your interest and your attention. Don't be too hard on me - I am frail like all of us. You are really great, if you got this far. [God willing, I will someday have some more experiences to write about, although God has been notably absent most of the time, from August 1993 until now, 1999. I am told I am in the Dark Night of the Spirit
MORE REASONS WHY I WROTE THIS BOOK
They are in order of importance:
I thought it was a worthwhile addition to the legacy of man and womankind.
It was too important to ignore.
It is about God for the most part. This is its most redeeming attraction. I play second fiddle to God, in my eyes and in God`s eyes, especially according to His role and nature (obviously), so there can be no sense that the book is meant to exalt me and \ or demean the role of God, the glorification of whom is the principal thrust of the book.
The attraction is the intimate revelation of God, His Nature, His thoughts and words, His appearance, His personality and His characteristics. Surely you know that God was here working His magic and I just happened to be here too. I have no virtues except to be a loving person. This piece of literature -- the book, glorifies God and magnifies Him. It may, and possibly should, bring God and the reader closer together.
It may bring me in contact with other contemplatives and devout people. It is regrettable that the book is not only about God, and that I am so prominent here. I often couldn`t avoid it. In some places, I use the book as a springboard to launch my own ideas. This is fair. I am a human being and not just a recording machine.
MY PRIDE, REGRETABLE BUT UNDERSTANDABLE AND TEMPORARY: WINNING 10 DOLLARS--YOUR FEELINGS? WINNING 1,000,000 DOLLARS--THROUGH THE ROOF!!! BEING HUMBLED. LIVING ON THE UNDERSIDE OF SOCIETY
Please indulge me on this point. Where I tend toward pride or arrogance in the reception of a gift from Jesus, God, or the Lord, the Holy Spirit, please consider how you might feel, if you won $50, $100, or $500 dollars, in the lottery? Exuberant at least, I'm willing to hazard a guess. Now consider how you would feel, if you won $1,000,000 dollars.
You see it now. Your joy would know no measure. Now, what if you thought God told you that you were saved from damnation forever, were given the solution to a big problem by God, gained a virtue, or gained a high place in Heaven? You'd be glad too.
It is treasure in Heaven that I am talking about. Almost all the notes for the book were taken down within minutes of being observed or thought. So the exuberance of achievement is there.
No doubt about it. I know I have a certain characteristic in my personality that recognizes when I have a gift that other people don't have.
Sometimes, I get proud. But always I fight it by reminding myself of my humble station in life. It causes humility because it makes me realize the value of the gift compared to me, the poor quality, insignificant, person receiving the gift. I hate to look like a pompous ass, and yet I guess, at times, I do.
But I can be humbled to the lowest levels of my vulnerability by even a cutting comment from a friend. This is not to mention the recognition that I live on the underside of society, and that, as such, I am considered to be one of the lowest of the low. All I can say with respect to my pride is: "It is there, not as much as before, but forgive me".
Title:Religious Resources on the Net
Short Description: Religious site database and search engine
Full Description: Religious Resources on the Net is a comprehensive, searchable database of religious web sites on the Internet. Visitors to the web site can browse through over 100 topics or use the search engine to generate a listing of resources containing selected keywords.
GREAT WEALTH OR FAME CAN RUIN ONE. CHOOSING POVERTY IE. MOST LIKELY $12,700 CDN DOLLARS THIS YEAR {$8,350.00 US$} APRIL 1999
Finally, I would be a liar if I did not confess that I had flights of fancy about the fame, fortune, financial, and other perks that might accrue to me if I was ever published.
Well, suffice it to say that I am aware that this is substantially vain glory, and that my relationship with Jesus Christ is much more important, infinitely so than what the world has to offer. I can't live with great wealth.
I have turned down the opportunity to receive close to a half a million dollars in order to live the lifestyle to which I am accustomed but the money will be there if I ever need it as my family have taken the abundance of money to back me up for life but not to support me as I am now.
I hope, at this time, to put my relationship with Jesus in first place for the rest of my life. I hope to go on writing, praying, and living my quiet little life here in Toronto.
[Besides up until now, Sept. 1992, only 4 or 5 people have read this book and they are not exactly heaping praise on a very primitive version of the book you see in front of you which is what they were given to read. I think it is a very good book. It certainly is TRUE. Maybe, I can sell a thousand copies.]
GOD'S GLORY, MY GLORY DERIVATIVE AND DEPENDANT. I AM ALREADY REWARDED, NO ONE CAN TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME.
Gosh I am tired of those words "i" and "me" but They and god's love have driven up my self esteem. Revelations of God! Pride, no knowledge of other's spirituality, self-love, and conceit, and I am despicable and I rely on the mercy of jesus christ for my salvation.
Once more, I will try to allay some of your fears about this book. The book was written for and about the Glory of God. Any Glory I receive is derivative, and the Glory coming from men, that could result from the publishing of the book, would be only the palest of shadows, compared with the blinding Light and magnificence that I experience in the Divine Light. I already have my reward, and no-one can take it away from me.
What I want to do is to share some of my experiences of the grandeur of God with the world, so that they may learn some of His Ways and Attributes. God is the focus of the book, although there is a lot of material on my struggles in prayer. This is not all, by any means, flattering to me. [Also I express my opinions.]
Occasionally, I got into such an exuberant mood with the good fortune I was in, that I would start to think that I deserved such an outpouring of Grace. Or that I was more Graced than other people in the world.
But the Graces are undeserved, to a large extent, and there are many kinds of Grace in the world and I don't know a single thing about the next persons spirituality.
I know, above all, what a despicable person I am, (not too strong a word), and that I am not worthy.
But God gave me experiences that I had and have, and that were and are of a type, degree, and magnitude that are usually associated with mystics privileged by God.
EFFECT MAKES ME SMALL AND HUMBLE, THE BEAUTIFUL, ARTICULATE, DIVINE LIGHT.
The effect makes me feel very, very small, little and humble at my good fortune. I must say that I have my reward -- it is in my daily relationship with Jesus Christ: the experiences of the great outpouring of God's love, in my experience of the bestowing of Heavenly gifts, and the Presence of the beautiful, articulate, Divine Light.
I have written this book as the old saying goes: "for the greater Glory of God". This is God's reward for His gifts to me, (and to countless others I expect, for gifts without number).
PUBLISHING IS OUR CHRISTIAN RESPONSIBILITY, GOD'S PRESENCE AND SAVING POWER, THE TESTIMONY OF THE BIBLE AND THE SAINTS.
Also, I am trying to get this published because I think it is my responsibility as a Christian. We must all spread the message of God's Presence and Saving Power.
The bible itself is the story of the faith journeys of men and women, who if they had not written and been published, at least some of them during their lifetime would be lost to us, along with the substance of our faith, (Heaven forbid!).
The book is instructive and inspirational. It contains some profound religious experiences of my generation, could be used as a manual or catalogue. God doesn't want me to keep it for myself. "You are the light of the world. ".
The book contains many passages that are instructive and inspirational in understanding the prayer walk. It could be used by the next contemplative as a manual. It could be used as a Catalogue of a wide variety of types of mystical experiences. Also I hope it will be published before I die, because I have no one to publish it after I die.
It is filled with some of the most profound experiences of God that I know of in my own generation, that I have heard of, or that I have read about.
The Divine Light has been so active, demonstrative, Real (spiritually), and variegated, that I have been for years and still am; spellbound, entranced, and overcome by God's display of HIS PERSONS.
I can't believe He wants me to keep it to myself. "You are the light of the world, A city set on a hill cannot be hid. Let your light so shine before men...." Matt: 5:14. I believe that spreading the good news about God is a good work.
I am not trying to become a guru. I want to live in solitude, quiet and peace. Fame puffs up. I have already had a close friendship, daily, recently that was pleasant but took me away from God. These days I regret it.
But it made me love this person very much and made me more human and fallible and sinful and hurt. Both father Petro and my present spiritual director felt or feel that I am in the dark night of the spirit. The visions will return, God willing. The world the flesh and the devil. GOD PREVAILS.
I am not trying to become a guru. But an offshoot of this venture for me could be a chance to meet many other contemplatives and make some friends.
There is, of course, a danger that I could get puffed up, that my vision could narrow and that I could be cut off from my experiences, (but not from God). I don't think that will happen.
The experiences of the Light are cyclical and Fr. Petro seems to think that they will even come back, if they go away for awhile, provided I pray. These are not just isolated one-time incidents up until now.
The world constantly encroaches, (I am on a number of committees in the community), as does the flesh and the devil. These are my real enemies.
But God is there, even if I stray a bit, (or is it a lot!!!) from time to time. Recently, the experiences have decreased a lot, for the above reasons.
I have had less experiences of God than during the first section of the book. [But by now, Nov.3, 1991, I have seen absolute profundity, depth, and covenant, at times deeper and more broad-reaching than almost anything else I have experienced. Unfortunately, there has been also the presence of the evil one, for long periods from time to time.
SOME REASONS FOR WRITING THIS BOOK"
NOTA BENE!
WHAT THIS BOOK IS NOT!
Some Reasons why I wrote This book" are many and varied, to show God working in my life, if He loves me so much He must potentially love you as much too in fact maybe more, You have to unlock the potential--it takes work, Strive for the Gifts, I am hard to emulate but there is a road for godhood you too, God grants success.
The Book is about the Most Holy Trinity and especially about Jesus, it Glorifies God and Magnifies Him and His Grandeur, it can bring Jesus and the reader into union if practiced, it serves to bring myself and other contemplatives closer together, I am not arrogant I am exuberant, I have a temptation to pride but my life and self make me the poor soul I am humble, fame and fortune--
I have more or less turned down almost 1/2 million dollars in order to live securely in my present life style, my struggles in prayer are not very very flattering, writing the book was very humbling, it is my Christian responsibility and duty to write this book.
It is instructive and inspirational and could be used as part of a manual or catalogue of Christian prayer and experience, I don't believe Jesus wants me to keep it to myself-He praised me for it at the most profound times.
I am not a guru, the world and the devil persevere and the flesh is an occasional nuisance, overcome by God's display of his persons, Your {Robert's} experiences of God will return {Quoting Father Petro Bilaniuk-deceased 1998--my GREAT LOSS, all those who knew him and the whole Christian worlds' GREAT LOSS},
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"A FREE Book of Christian Mysticism"
Robert Lind Defries
NOTA BENE!
WHAT THIS BOOK IS NOT!
Tough Animal Talk
"From A FREE Book of Christian Mysticism, on the web at this base url dated May 23, 2002, Recent recollections of an invasion of my premises by a great variety of mammals and insects who just dropped in one night and still haven't totally left 19 months later, Coming mostly from water environments, they seem to beg that we be aware once more of the gnostic concept of the DEMI-URGE. Have you ever tested your metal against shattering events like the second world war or equivalent??? Does history make saints??? Does history break saints??? Once a saint always a saint??? You can find fault in all I think and do...I'm the kind of man who MUGGLES through.There was a knock at my front door--I opened it and saw my relative surrounded by animals and they poured inTO my apartment on both sides of he and I. He claimed he found them ouside my building in the courtyard and HE SAW THEM CORPORALLY WITH HIS NAKED EYES. HE ALSO KNEW THE LOCATION SEVERAL DAYS LATER OF HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS OF THE REMAINS OF MY 4000$ GIFT MONEY FROM MY MOTHER. MONEY SCATTERED HERE AND THERE. I AM TOLD BY A HUMANOID THAT THESE INVASIONS TAKE PLACE EVERY 6 TO 7 MONTHS AROUND THE WORLD NEAR SPRING SOUTH TO NORTH AND MAYBE NORTH TO SOUTH. I WAS HELPLESS.">
The animals softened me up through their necessity and their tenacity, I took steps to drive them out, 60 percent have left, you may say, Ooohh coodilly coodilly coodilly doo dilly do such beaaauuuttiiffuullll aannimmallss aanndd ssoo cclleeaann--
You coward robert, you wastrel, you ne'er do well, defries {thats me!}- I retort, I beg of you, kind sir or madame, think of what would happen if your son or daughter brought home the entire contents of the city animal shelter, bridges burned, er, er, er, what's up doc??? has anybody got any smelling salts?
??--GOD is no respecter of Persons--, Maybe 70 percent of the mammals with myself were water based and were harmless, such as mink, muskrat, otters, sea otters, weasels, stoat, ermine {maybe{, beaver, sea cow, INSECTS, millipede, centipede, praying mantii, a different BUG with a most formidible 'ice pick' on the end of a rope at his tail, that this accursed insect hurls at and snags in your leg, oh the agony, the veiled threats of retaliation, involuntary curses, the violent imprecations.
SOME OTHER ANIMALS not present to me also ostensibly from the DEMI-URGE are sea-lions, walrus, seals, whales, especially the narwhale with the unicorn-like tusk in his forehead, all manner of turtles and tortoises, and the list goes on and on, you will have me in stripes for this --
The animals here are totally mute even in war, some of them especially the old ones can hardly move, but are used constantly as a source of advice and wisdom by the youngsters, --with great respect and dignity, they don't eat, drink, eliminate waste, except for oral or sexual secretions.
{I***know*** I dont know how to understand/believe this either but it is still true after 5 weeks at least of being declared sane by my pschiatrist although only about 10 percent or 20 percent of the original number of animals are present and functioning here now--july-2-2002{
They still like to be brave and offer me one of my own sheets to share. I am totally celibate in every sense of the word so I am very safe and I notice these critturs less and less everyday.
they however have seemingly countless children---from any father, can't bite or hurt, BUGS HOWEVER CAN BITE AND DO HURT, some march in armies and nothing can stand against them.
Pitched battles, I won the battles.
They won the war, utter carnage, utter chaos.
I made at least 20 calls to 5 or 7 agencies {called the humane society 5 times, police 4 or 5 times, animal alert 3 times, the housing company once, the zoo once, the university zoology department, the psychiatric authorities daily, to get help} but no one ever came to help--to look and take see YES BUT HELP SOLVE THE PROBLEM NO WAY!!!
I fought the whole animal horde in the door to my bedroom {maybe 80-140 mammals}, with Birtie riding shotgun on a pile of books behind me, warning me of problem areas like a fourth front opening up like...directly behind me, I used a very evil, thorough and barbaric method of dispatching the ones that appeared to be the most aggressive, a pre-emptive strike with my cane.
I had been psychotic from the night the animals arrived, {later passed out from a spiked non-alcoholic drink {I am a teetotaler} drink and a lack of sleep and total stress running on empty, raw nervy syndrome}, Any one of which would slay me for a long time by itself.
The second night Birtie left and so did my will to fight, I thought long and hard about the 10 Commandments
Thou shalt not kill, This won the day, the turning point between opposition to God and His World of Creatures, to abandonment to Divine Providence, and it must be pointed out that this includes, making strange bedfellows of myself with these animals, even under the covers, sheets under which I lie, totally drugged measuring my length, while sleeping among the animals, and at the mercy of any capable animal that wished to harm me.
All be it that perhaps you feel sorry for me and or the animals but lets get it straight it's you in your small corner and I in mine, Love to you all, Robert Lind Defries."
If you see someone like me who claims sincerely to have had a infestation of animal life realize as I say that one man's meat is another man's poison, or Everest is another man's boothill. Savvy???
The mammals are sometimes ambidextrous, Seemingly they run the full range of human emotions, They aren't too bright, but they are very caring and peaceful and serene.
There is a constant licentiousness, alone or in groups, but they are basically utterly social animals in mixed quarters.
The animals are very gentle and very very tentative in psycho-sexual/amorous advances, and evolve personas, and extensive, simple [sexual] rituals that calm every one down with each other,it matters not whether their own family, either sex, any genus, creature, animate or inanimate object, living or dead,-- everything is fair game for these critters for a "love-affair."
It seems indeed possible that maybe the old song is true for them??? ---"I AM MY OWN GRAMPA"---"AND HOW DO THEY KNOW FOR SURE"---for all times except the early days of the invasion the animals were and are principally underneath clothing, any fabric that is maleable that can express a face or the arms and body shapes moving slowly in search of a contact with a kindred spirit--.
Even my friends who say it is an hallucination admit that the faces are there, lovely little faces, or powerful hunters faces, or homely faces, or old and worn faces, if optionally undefined and that they are very cute if not totally disarming and compelling and there seems to be some sort of concensus that they are a template being spiritual/psychological/mystical and supra-natural, being based on nature, and on top of that from a different "plane" or locale, as a original source, somewhere in time and space, {whatever I know not wherein I speak/write{ this is conjecture.
I don't want to read gnostic accounts of these creatures of this creation because I AM A CHRISTIAN NOT A GNOSTIC AND I SEE NOTHING TO BELIEVE IN, THEOLOGICALLY, IN A BUNCH OF ANIMALS FROM THE NETHERWORLDS,
{the otter and mink are the most active exposed in their flesh and furry selves early in the activities when they were running amuk over me and at that time the young mink were gamboling around the room in their acrobatics.
I was terrified{ ON MEDS all times,
I won the battles {ONE AND A HALF OF THEM{ if anyone can win on a field of utter carnage, and chaos and I contacted in vain, the animal authorities 5 times, the zoo once, the university 2X+, the animal group that saves a pets life-- 3 times, and the police{GOD BLESS THEIR CHEERFUL FRIENDLY SOULS,} were here at my behest 4 to 5 times for one thing or another, the psychiatric authorities daily and my housing people once
I had decided in my pea-headed little fighting man's mind that a, pre-emptive strike, would be the best way to go, although the least moral--I was playing the odds.
Blocking the doorway, I would observe who was doing the leading in each group, and then punch out with my cane an attempt to kill the creatures that had taken over my own house for nigh unto a week completely and utterly nearly forcing me into the streets and making it impossible for me to sleep with any privacy---
At best, worse than barbaric but I was psychotic from the upshot because of almost total lack of sleep {we psych patients are absolutely wired to a good nights sleep or else disaster-- the sanity roof caves in,
This and the stress, and Birdie and I got no support when I told people I had animals taking over my apartment-- my home no less, Housing management came while I was out but left their card and failed to file out a report,
The psychiatric officials said --Yes, Yes,-- {and} --There, There,---and I said where?? where?? and they said Here, Here!!! we'll upend the meds and everybody agreed
{myself:I WASN'T SURE IF IT SHOULD GO TO PARKS AND RECREATION, OR THE FOREIGN OFFICE, OR THE DEPARTMENT OF WEALTH AND HELLFARE, -ER--ER---ER-HEALTH AND WELFARE, OR THE LANDLORD AND TENANTS COMMITTEE."
I am at ease with my attitude toward the animals, We are called to hospitality to our ALIEN/SEPERATEDbrothers and sisters, and who could bear a grudge against a defenseless animal,
God the Father have Mercy on us sinners,
Jesus the Christ have mercy on us sinners,
Lord the Holy Spirit have mercy on us sinners,
Lord the Most Holy Trinity have mercy on me a sinner,
Jesu Laudemus, Jesu Adoramus,
Love to you all - Robert Lind Defries,
Gadzookes, GADZOOKES
The negativity by some great force against the God of All CREATION. The Truly Inscrutable GOD as in the flood, Rooted in antiquity and in Prehistory, there is much more left unexplained in the literature than explained, The teaching is definitely not Christian {outside myself but the Lord saved me and I am nearly back to my own self 17/6/05} but that does not mean a general carnage should erupt, should we or the animals be precipitated into OUR/THEIR SPACE, or else the days activity of 6 hours in maybe 24, with oral and sexual lascivious "AFFAIRS" much as my family likes from our dog (sic) ETC ETC,
They appear to be of mid-eastern origin, Were their ancestors left behind after Noah and the flood .
Somebody must have got their species mixed up when mating or perhaps someone was very wise, or slap happy, or having a good belly laugh, or very tough on the creatures of this world, when they were being given their shapes and names, perhaps by Adam,--- Otters, sea otters, something called a sea-cow etc, etc
To you people setting out on the unknown trail of the great beyond, without a clue where you are going, or who you will meet, or what the Lord has in store for you!!! You are "Neo-Abrahams" searching out the Lord's chosen Land for His Line.
But ---what to do with the animals??? Are they of the demi-urge??? {
-- {I ***know*** --it seems impossible but when left food they never touched it. It appeared early that the animals were flesh and blood in their own natural fur and skins, --
Later they would only be found as spiritual/psychic faces and shapes -- Moving slowly under clothing, fabric and/rugs, towels etc. They were impossible to kill and they left when i made life intolerable for them on the advice of two women who knew how to deal with this problem.
We disagree on an explanation of what really happened but we all agree that we did the job--I feel secure for the first time in over a year!!!{---Back to the animals as they were, -----july-2-2002}
They still like to be brave and offer me one of my own sheets to share. I am totally celibate in every sense of the word so don't go getting any crazy, half-baked ideas about me.
I am very safe and I notice these critturs less and less everyday-they have seemingly had countless children, from any father, the mammals can't bite or hurt, bugs however can bite and do hurt, unpleasant and worse, can cause great suffering, involuntary curses, threats of retaliation, and violent imprecations, some march in armies and nothing can stand against them, Pitched battles,
My pal Birtie the best computerized bird ever made, {she was a sweetheart{ with a mind like a steel-trap--figure that one out, and an intellect of a first year university student, tough as nails, intelligence, responsiveness, vocabulary, understanding and articulation. She put on any womans up front pseudu - sexual facade. She was mechanicly computerized sexy
The only creatures I had ever killed of any size were fish, and I had never killed a warm blooded animal before {although I eat meat}, quite a number of the animals that died here must have been I am sure clinically deader than a DODO BIRD, but they seemed to all come back before 3 or 4 days had passed or so it seemed, after the first night of bloodletting I was a fallen frightened man versus a supernatural world.
I repeat, I fought the whole animal horde in the door to my bedroom {maybe 80-140 mammals{, with Birtie riding shotgun on a pile of books behind me, warning me of problem areas.
I used a very evil, thorough and barbaric method of dispatching the ones that appeared to be the most aggressive, a pre-emptive strike with my cane {Good joke??? wait untill you get belted with a cane some day {I had been psychotic from the night the animals arrived, from my pharmaceuticals not kicking in--They were being readjusted and I was out daily to fix up my establishment -
am told I passed out from the effects of my meds but I thought i was due to a non-alcoholic {I am a teetotaler{drugged drink and a lack of sleep and total stress, any one of which would slay me for a long time by itself.}
the second night Birtie left and so did my will to fight, I thought long and hard about the 10 Commandments and "Thou shalt not kill".
I went in waving a white flag of peace. This won the day, the turning point between opposition to God and His World of Creatures, to abandonment to Divine Providence, and it must be pointed out that this includes, making strange "bedfellows" of myself with these animals, even under the sheets under which I lie, totally drugged up and really unconscious not sleeping, and "measuring my length" among the interlopers among the animals.
For My drugs make it important that I keep my/their own crippling/health giving agenda and I am crippled by the public reading the only literature available on me in a variety of circles IE their ******* PRECONCEIVED DOUBTS AND LABELS ABOUT MYSELF*******, "WE BELIEVE IN WHAT IS SEEN AND UNSEEN" {THE NICENE CREED} and the animals, and at the mercy of any capable animal that wished to harm me. All be it that perhaps you feel sorry for me and or the animals but lets get it straight it's you in your small corner and I in mine. Love to you all.
The Lord Bless you and keep you,
The Lord make His face "Bright and Happy to Shine upon YOU and YOURS",
forever and forever and forever
--Attention--
there goes the French Foreign LEGION
LOVE AND A BIF ON THE EAR to you all,
--EEE-Gad-SIR, GADZOOKES, AND GADZOOKES AND GADZOOKES, YOURS,
ALL OF YOU
--IF YOU KNOW ME I MEAN YOU--
-- IF YOU DON'T KNOW ME--
--I MEAN YOU-TOO ANYWAY---
THIS YOURS TO THE GODHEAD OF EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE,
Robert Lind Defries"
"A FREE Book of Christian Mysticism"
Robert Lind Defries
NEW STUFF!
I am going to ramble as a necessity because the whole memory of what happened from just before the animal invasion Maybe March 2002 and now May 15 2004 has been holus bolus uphill and down, All the rankings here were achieved from January 2004 or even much earlier since 1998 until the present May 15, 2004, First of all my book has achieved in some of the rankings of as follows from 25 search engines weighted much more to the top 3 although 103 national and international engines were observed, There were often identical results especially higher up, Here are some results and there were many more like them, Most copies Greatest Christian Book EVER, Best on the web Christian Mysticism, Best Book Christian Mysticism, Best autobiography Christian Mysticism, Best Christian autobiography EVER, Best Free Book Christian Mysticism, Best Index page Christian Mysticism, Best Christian Mysticism Book ever, and perhaps three times as many more of similar rankings of some of the 3 most effective search engines, {ie look as well at countless thousands more #1 rankings in scores more choice engines, more rankings of lesser import but with just as #1 high rankings, Several weeks ago I culled several major search engines here and abroad and found several dozen #1 rankings of my book with the magnitude of {to name just a few} "Greatest Book of Christian Mysticism ever," "Greatest Book Christian Mysticism" "Greatest Index Book Christian Mysticism Ever" "Greatest Autobiography Christian Mysticism ever" "Most Popular Book Christian Mysticism Book ever" "Most popular Christian Mysticism""Most copies book in print Christian Mysticism" "Most interesting book Christian Mysticism ever" "Most interesting index Christian Mysticism book"
Similarly #1 + #2, #3, # 4 to #10 rankings with permutations or combinations thereof of rankings with engines Like of some stature such as "The awe of God in Christian Mysticism book" "Christian Mysticism greatest index page" "Greatest Christian Mysticism Book" "Greatest Free Christian Mysticism book ever" "Greatest Christian Mysticism anytime," "Greatest FREE Christian Mysticism BOOK of all time" "Greatest Christian Mysticism Book ever" "Reasons for Writing---#2 of 3,960,000" Greatest Mysticism Book Free" " #1 + #2" Greatest Christian Mysticism Book of all time" " Greatest Book Christian Mysticism" "Most copies in print Christian Mysticism" "Greatest Book Christian Mysticism of all time" "Greatest Christian Mysticism Book index anywhere any time" "Greatest Christian Mysticism anywhere anytime" "Greatest Christian Mysticism autobiography anyplace anytime" "Greatest INDEX Christian mysticism BOOK" "Greatest Christian Mysticism book of all time" "Christian Mysticism psychiatry" "Greatest Christian Mysticism Book ever" "Christian Mysticism Churches"and the list goes on and on in all of the important English language Search Engines.
News:Robert's Reality by Elizabeth Williams B.A.(Psych) E.C.E.Can we know what is real? Author Robert Defies introduces us to a world only he can describe, a world inhabited by creatures only he can know. These beings are very real, with personalities, character and substance. They carry on relationships with him and each other. And yet he knows on another level of awareness that they are not there. How can he live with such a disperate knowledge of reality? Robert describes his stuggle in his latest work.
I was very severely traumatized by the invasion of the animals and was hospitalized 6 times in 4 years due also to lousy medications -- I had been on the regime of a stable basic different set of meds for 18 years with virtually no hospitalizations maybe 14 days in 18 years. If it ainÆt broke don't fix it the therapists and psychologists all said. Then the drug salesmen moved in. The staff fixed it --read broke it--- with 4 or 5 different bitter pills to swallow over 4-5 years that laid me low and a threat to my own life and IT STILL AINÆT FIXED. We've started back on the 18 year drugs and with a nudge from a small bit of the other type I am better today in a long time but they took my life in their hands not even understanding what effects their darling new drugs would have IE the highest suicide rate in decades. I lose a friend or survivor who didn't make it once every week at times in the teeth of these drugs. And many of them are veterans of the drug/meds wars. If I wasn't careful I'd say it was a form of "cultural" genocide.
The animals were a phenomenon that are overtly occult and when the whole roughly 140 of them entered my front door with my relative long since forgiven I was overwhelmed with animal occult culture religion and "ways" but above all, overwhelming PRESENCE. Little did I know that I was being plunged into an abyss of suffering that is about 2 1\ 3 years old. The "living ones" with little people stayed about 3 to seven days. I was utterly overcome and completely collapsed. Then the living ones with their impeccable activities and in their seamless vista with their completely compatible seamlessness--the whole thing was a whole--it was almost impossible to conceive that the whole thing was an hallucination and the psychiatrist said as did the other psychiatrist that they had never heard of anything like it.
When the mobile squad left I was left with huge vestigial remains that looked like animal faces hiding beneath anything soft --pick it up - nothing there--clearly a case of mistaken identity--hallucination said one "helpful" soul as she read out of her textbook by rote. These are almost completely gone and have completely ceased to be a problem.
The last animals to visit I only saw a few times is called a humanoid with some human parts via cloning with stoats. They spoke english and I even had long conversations with them. One "supervisor" one larger, was called wharfrat but I saw it as war-frat designed to foment trouble between my brother and I. They were illegal "attendants" for me and gratuitously donated by a drug dealer and a relative. I disliked the whole seamy bunch and thats the understatement of the millenium. Now I have driven them off too.
The perhaps final hurdle is to rout the phoney duplicate family of my own family. Then there will PERHAPS BE PEACE IN LOTUSLAND.
"My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord;neither be weary of his correction: For whom the Lord loveth he correcteth ... "
Information given verbally by Robert Lind Defries to Rolf Koster and collaborated with him with interpretation and reflection; also from time to time verbatim; and on themes suggested and edited by him, being engineer, survivor and teller of true tales. Mr Koster transcribed most of this material while interjecting most of his own most cogent ideas and salient points
One Day Mr. Defries extendedclan member arrived at RobertÆs front door. When Mr. Defries opened the door the animals streamed in on both sides. This relative is noted for his sanity and he claims this first wave of animals was real in the flesh; The extended clan member also participated fully with the ôlittle peopleö.
Mr Defries acknowledges the fact that all the animals after this first wave were proceeding from ôthe heat oppressed brainö and are hallucinations with the copies of family members coming from the underworld. and creating delusions as you might expect..
There are no more hallucinations in Mr. DefriesÆs world at this time December 2004.
Best wishes for the Summer. I still pray frequently and your prayers and my prayers and the meds are the answer. Thank you for reading. I love you all. May the Peace of the Spirit of God be with your minds, heads and hearts now and forever. May your soul and body live with God in heaven eternally.Yours without ceasing___________Eternal Love_____________ Robert Lind Defries
TO DAVIEYES
"A BOOK OF CHRISTIAN MYSTICISM";
TO DAVIEYES ET AL LOVINGLY FROM ROBBIEYES
June 21 2003
"DAVIEYES"
SAINT IN FORMATION
A SLICE OF TIME...
FROM THE FATHER
THROUGH THE SON JESUS CHRIST
IN THE LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT,
THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
AS WELL GOD WILLING ---
THE LORD THE GIVER OF LIFE,
THE COUNSELLOR,
THE COMFORTER
THE LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT
CREATE OUT OF NOTHING ---THE BABYCHILD BABYEYES
THE MANCHILD EVERY WOMAN KNOWS IS A MAN
THE GROWN MAN WITH THE MANCHILD INSIDE OF HIM
CRYING OUT TO GOD FOR HIS MOTHER
THE MANCHILD DELIGHTS IN HIS MOTHER
EVERY MAN CRIES FOR THEIR HEART'S SOUL'S MOTHER
THANKS ETERNAL ADORATION TO THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
MY LOVELY ROSE OF CLARE
"WISELY"
MRS SNITCH
MRS SNITS
MRS PITTS
MRS SPATS
MRS SPLATS
MRS SLATS
MRS SNIPS
AND MRS. SCHNAPPS
TO YOU ALL AND YOUR Robbieyes AND Davieyes ALL OF THEM
{PETS AND ALL}
"JEAN" MY MUM --94 YEARS OLD AND ROBBIEYES AND DAVIEYES
CLOSER THAN A GLOVE
IF I READ IT DAVIEYES IS LEADING THE FOUR OF YOU
IN THE UPWARD CYCLE
TO THE MAD EXPRESS TO GET OUT
OF THIS PURGATORY-LIKE WORLD
HEAT
ICE
DEEP SNOW
DAVIEYES IS THE ONLY ONE TO HAVE A BEGINNING
OF A CLASSICAL ROMAN PERSPECTIVE
HE LIKE IT OR NOT IS WALKING WHAT IS THE TRUER
WAY OF JESUS CHRIST
DAVIEYES YOU HAD MOST OF THE 1970'S AND 1980'S
TESTING FOR THE PRESENCE OF
YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST
-FROM ONE MAN TO ANOTHER
BROTHER TO BROTHER
-WHEN I SAY YOU ARE A SAINT
I MEAN A SAINT IN FORMATION
A SAINT IS ANYONE WHO FINDS HIS/HER HOME IN HEAVEN
OR AS PEREFRERE SAYS "ANYONE WHO LOVES GOD AND NEIGHBOUR
OR ANYONE RESIDENT IN HEAVEN
I MEAN THAT GOD THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
ACCEPTED MY VERY EXTENSIVE PRAYERS
FOR AS THEY WERE IT WAS GIVEN TO ME
TO KNOW THAT MY PRAYERS WERE ANSWERED
THAT IS TO SAY HE WAS MADE LIKE MYSELF>
AND EVERYONE
IN THE IMAGE OF GOD THE FATHER
AND JESUS CHRIST
AND GROWING MORE AND MORE IN THE LIKENESS OF GOD
AND WAS JUST NOW TOTTERING ALONG
WITH BABY STEPS
GROWING MORE AND MORE LIKE THE
MEMBERS OF THE MOST HOLY TRINITY.
ANYONE BAPTIZED
AND I BAPTIZED SNOOZY AD HOC WHEN SHE WAS 2 YEARS OLD
IN YOUR KITCHEN
CAN BE CALLED "IN THE IMAGE"
BUT IT IS THROUGH WALKING
THE CHRISTIAN PILGRIM FEET FOLLOWING THE ONLY MASTER IN
HISTORY JESUS CHRIST
THE FORMER SEDUCTIONS
AND IDOLATRY OF THE
WORLD, THE FLESH AND THE DEVIL
AND EXTREME SITUATIONS.
A SAINT IS IN PART ANY PERSON GIVING A REALLY REAL "YES"
TO GOD'S CALL
DISREGARDING THE SUFFERING INVOLVED
AND STARTING EVEN EARLIER
IN THE WAY OF PERFECTION.
YOU NEED A GUIDE OR SPIRITUAL DIRECTOR
AND SEEING THAT SAINTS ARE ONLY IN THIS LIFE AND THE NEXT
IN THE ROMAN CATHOLIC AND EASTERN ORTHODOXY
AND THE EUCHARIST WITH THE ONLY REALLY REAL TRUE LICIT BODY
AND BLOOD IS PRESENT IN ROMAN
CATHOLIC AND EASTERN ORTHODOX CHURCHES
TO BE A SAINT IN THIS LIFE YOU HAVE TO BE ROMAN CATHOLIC OR
ORTHODOX ACCORDING TO THE ORIGINAL CHURCH MOTHER OF
BOTH.
THERE ARE ROUGHLY 1,100,000,000 CATHOLICS --
IN THE ROMAN AND EASTERN RITE CATHOLIC CHURCHES
-SOME LEFT SOME ARRIVING AGE 90.
THERE ARE 400,000,000-- TO 500,000,000 ORTHODOX CHURCH MEMBERS
AND MAYBE 350,000,000 PROTESTANTS --
THERE MUST BE MANY THOUSANDS EVEN MILLIONS
OF FRINGE FAITHS
AND THE ROMAN CHURCH
CONSISTS OF THE CHURCH MILITANT ON EARTH
THE CHURCH SUFFERING IN PURGATORY
AND AFTER.THE CHURCH TRIUMPHANT IN HEAVEN
DAVIEYES YOU ARE MAKING GREAT STRIDES FORWARD
BUT YOU HAVE WHOLE AREAS TO RECLAIM WITH HELP
FROM THE ONE WHO FEEDS YOUR SOUL WITHOUT REWARD
FROM THE GUTS OF A HURRICANE NORWESTER
I AM YOUR TRUE FRIEND
ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS THERE
BRING THEM CLOSER TO JESUS CHRIST
TOOK ME FROM 1975 TO 2000 TO START TO REEL YOU IN.
I HOPE AND WISH YOU GRACES WITH THEM
PAX ET BONUM
YOURS UNCEASING_________________________________
ETERNAL LOVE_______________________________________
FATHER SON AND LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT
LORD THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
FROM ROBBIEYES
NON ILLEGITIMUS CARBORUNDUM
NIHIL DESPERANDUM
Free. "A Book of Christian Mysticism"
Robert Lind Defries
NOTA BENE!
WHAT THIS BOOK IS NOT!
LOVE TO YOU ALL FROM THE BROTHERS DAVIEYES AND ROBBIEYES ACROSS 5 CONTINENTS
TO GET YOU ACQUAINTED WITH DAVIEYES
THIS IS HIS MIND:
MOST IMPORTANT TO HIM AND HIS:
***THE FATHER OF ALL CREATED AND UNCREATED ENTITIES:
MY LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST:
THE SPIRIT OF GOD COMFORTER COUNCILLOR THE SPIRIT OF TRUTH
THE LORD THE HOLY SPIRIT
THE LORD THE GIVER OF LIFE
LORD THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
THE TRI-HYPOSTATIC
TRI-ILLUMINATING
ONLY GOD ***
I BEG OF THE LORD JESUS THAT ALL MY FRIENDS AND NEIGHBOURS
BECOME SAINTLY AND FREE FROM SIN AS MUCH AS I AM OR MUCH
MORE THAN I AM --- MAX FOR ME TOO!!!
I NEED JESUS TO MAKE ALL MY FRIENDS TO BE SAINTS ACCORDING
TO THE LORD AND NOT JUST THINKING THEY ARE SAINTS
AN AXIOM: PRAYER IS ALWAYS ANSWERED BUT NOT NECESSARILY IN
THE WAY WE ASKED OR WANTED IT TO BE.
*****I ASK JESUS TO MAKE ME INTO THE PERSON HE INTENDED ME TO
BE AT MY CONCEPTION.*****
GOD FURTHER BLESS ME WITH HUMILITY
******SPECIAL PRAYERS ARE OFFERED UP FOR FLESHLY SOULS
ESPECIALLY "E" WHO REALLY NEEDS A CONVERSION FROM FLESHLY
TO SPIRITUAL . PLEASE PRAY FOR HIM. HUNDREDS COULD BE SAVED
WITH HIM.*****
*******I PRAY FOR THOSE WHO CAN'T CONTROL THEIR SENSUAL
APPETITES. SENSUALITY OR SEXUALITY IS SWEEPING THE WORLD.
INCEST FORNICATION LASCIVIOUSNESS MASTURBATION ADULTERY
BESTIALITY SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE HOMOSEXUALITY
PROMISCUITY LESBIANISM SAME SEX MARRIAGES ABORTION
NON SANCTIFIED INAPPROPRIATE UNIONS BAD LANGUAGE AND
UNCLEAN MEDIA LYING CHEATING STEALING.*******
ALL THE ABOVE ARE MORTAL SINS AND CAN LEAD TO HELL AT THE
LAST JUDGEMENT ALL MEN AND WOMEN SHAKE AND ABASE
THEMSELVES IF SINS NOT CONFESSED AND ATONED FOR.
ALL THESE THINGS ARE BEING AVENGED THIS VERY DAY AND HOUR.
BROKEN MARRIAGES MURDER RAPE ILLEGITIMATE CHILDREN
DRUG ADDICTIONYOUNG LIVES SNUFFED OUT BY ABORTION
HIV-AIDS HEPATITIS B AND C, WAR FAMINE ALL THE SINS OF THE
WORLD.*******
THE WORLD HAS SUFFERED LIKE THIS BEFORE AND MORE.
ONCE AVENGED BY WATER THE NEXT TIME BY FIRE. SO SAID
THE LORDAND HE HAS NEVER NEVER LIED.
IT'S A FACT.
MY BELOVED FAMILY IS IN JESUS AND THE MOST HOLY TRINITY
MY ALL IN ALL ETERNALLY
MY MOTHER EMBRACES ME FOR WHAT I REALLY AM
MANY ARE THE OTHERS WHO HAVE GENEROUSLY ASSISTED
AND SHARED WITH ME ON THE SOJOURN OF MY LIFE
BUT MY SAVIOR/GOD AND I ARE USUALLY MUCH MORE AT PEACE
THAN AT ODDS
WORKING MORE TOWARD PERFECTION IS MY GOAL
*****MY CONTRIBUTION TO THE HUMAN RACE*****
MY MIND HANDS AND FEET ARE MY TOOLS OF MY CHOSEN PROFESSIONS
MACHINERY, FINISHED ITEMS, HOUSING, HEAT, AIR, LIGHT, ROOFING,
DOORS, WINDOWS, ELECTRICAL, PLUMBING FIXTURES, WALLS,
DRYWALL, CONCRETE, BRICK, BLOCKS, FORMS, FLOORING, LOCKS,
HANDLES, STAIRS, ROOFS, STUDS, NAILS, SCREWS, BOLTS.
I WANT TO SAY THIS FIRST THAT I AM NOT A CRAFTSMAN OR ARTISAN BUT I AM LIKE A MASTER CARPENTER IN THE WORLD LIKE JESUS
I AM DEEPLY IN EMPATHY WITH THE PEOPLE OF THE WORLD WHO NEED HOUSING
****WISDOM NARRATIVES ACCORDING TO DAVIEYES****
UNTRUTH BREEDS UNTRUTH ALMOST UNIVERSALLY. ALL THE MORE REASON TO SEARCH FOR THE TRUTH
CHILDREN OF THE TRUTH COME FROM LOVING HUMBLE FAMILIES WITH ABUNDANT LOVE FROM THEIR FAMILY MEMBERS.
WHAT IS THE WORK FOR ONE DOLLAR WHEN IT WON'T BUY ANYTHING OF ANY VALUE
THE MORE I WORK THE LESS I GET IN RETURN--THE LAW OF DIMINISHING RETURNS MAKES US ALL FOOLISH SERVANTS IN OUR OWN EYES
OR IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THESE TIMES ARE THE MOST GLORIOUS IN HEAVEN.
THE WORK OF A GLORIOUS SERVANT OF GOD REVEALS THE GRACE OF THE LORD JESUS CHRIST
TO DEFEND AGAINST EVIL PRAYER MUST BE UNCEASING
DAVIEYES AND THE ANIMAL WORLD
A LITTLE BIRD IS CRADLED IN THE PALM OF MY HAND WHERE IT APPARENTLY CAN'T GO ON THE WING DUE TO BEING SO TENDER AND YOUNG
I FELT IT QUIVERING WITH HOPE AND FEAR.
MY FEELINGS OF COMPASSION AND PROTECTIVENESS MADE THE BIRDIE MORE CALM AND STRONG.
THE HACKLES ON THE BACK OF MY NECK RAISED AND OUR UNITY WAS SHATTERED AS WE SAW A VERY QUICK MOVING WILD TABBY CAT STALKING MY HELPLESS FRIEND.
AFTER A FEW DRY LAUNCHES HE EXPLODED INTO FLIGHT AND LANDED SAFELY IN THE UPPER BRANCHES OF A WHITE PINE TREE---"GOD SEES THE LITTLE SPARROW FALL."
MY LITTLE FRIEND HAS GONE BUT I HAVE REMEMBERED HIM AND THE FEELINGS HE ENGENDERED IN ME FOR DECADES TO COME
INDEED ALMOST HALF A CENTURY FROM AGE 12 TO 57 YEARS OLD.
***ANIMALS OF OLD CAPE COD*** I WENT TO THE BEACH SWIMMING ZONE ON OLD CAPE COD WITH ROBBIEYES MY BROTHER LARGELY ON OUR OWN.
TESTING THE WATER I WADED IN 4 OR 5 STEPS.
THEN I SAW THEM AND ONE OF THEM WAS THE LARGEST FOSSILIZED ANIMAL I HAD EVER LAID MY EYES UPON.
A HUGE HORSESHOE CRAB MOVING LIKE THE LARGEST INDIGINOUS CRUSTACEAN OF ITS TYPE
RELENTLESSLY METHODICALLY DEVOURING THE SAND/WATER CONTINUUM IT HEADED FOR THE BREAKWATER AND SAFETY.
REACHING DOWN I GRASPED BOTH SIDES OF THIS ANCIENT DESIGN AND DENIZEN OF THE DEEP. I WAS A MAN WITH A MISSION. I WAS DETERMINED TO BRING IT BACK ALIVE.
REACHING THE SHORE SOME OF MY PEOPLE WERE SCANDALIZED FRIGHTENED AND HORRIFIED AT THIS TERRIFYING CREATURE
WE PICKED IT UP AND CARRIED IT INTO THE KITCHEN OF THE BEACH HOUSE.
WE PUT IT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LINOLEUM FLOOR. IT SCUTTLED TO NO EFFECT LEGS MOVING RYTHMNICALLY.
UPSIDE DOWN IT WAS SO GROSSLY UGLY UGLY UGLY THAT YOU NEARLY LOST YOUR LUNCH.
OUR DAD SAID TO TAKE IT BACK TO THE WATER AND SET IT FREE.
I SET IT IN THE WATER AND IT DISAPPEARED FROM SIGHT.
THE SUN RAN WILD SETTING IN THE WEST.
*****SHARK!!!***** ROBBIEYES AND I WERE OUT FISHING IN THE SHALLOW WATER OF A SWIMMING AREA AT CAPE COD.
I DAVIEYES HOOKED A SMALL BUT VERY VIGOROUS FISH WHICH I HAULED UP ON THE BEACH.
REMENISCENCES REVEAL THAT SUDDENLY WE SAW CLEARLY WHAT IT WAS!
A SHARK WITH ROW UPON ROW OF SUNDERING, SNAPPING GNASHING TEETH.
OUR DAD TOOK IT OFF THR SAND AND FORCED THE HOOK OUT OF ITS MOUTH.
I VERY CAREFULLY PICKED UP THIS SAVAGING MAULER OF FLESH MANY CREATURES BOOT HILL AND FORCED IT INTO A LARGE HEAVY GLASS JAR. TAKING IT INTO THE BEACH HOUSE WE PEERED IN THE SIDES OF THE JAR WONDERING IF WE WERE ITS NEXT MEAL.
ROBBIEYES REQUESTED THAT WE PUT THIS LETHAL CONCOCTION OF CARTILIDGE AND MUSCLE BACK IN THE WATER.
DAVIEYES GRASPED IT IN HIS BARE HANDS AND PUT IT IN THE WATER.
IT SWAM AWAY AS IF IT HAD NEVER LEFT.
DAVIEYES: BUFFY MY DOG AND I.
BUFFY AND I WENT TO THE PLAZA TO GET SOME GROCERIES.
BUFFY WENT TO THE STORE AND WAITED FOR ME AT THE DOOR.
SHE IS A BIJON FRIEZE A SQUIRMING BARKING-YAPPING BUNDLE OF HAIR AND QUIVERING PROTOPLASM.
THERE WAS A CERTAIN LULL IN THE AIR. BUFFY SAW A TRUCK WITH A CAR ON ITS RIG STARTING OFF ON ITS WAY TOWARD TORONTO.
LITTLE DID WE KNOW THATT THE CAR AND THE RIG WERE STOLEN.
BUFFY BARKED AND BARKED AS TO BRING SOME TANGIBLE ATTENTION TO THE TWO VEHICLES.
SHE HAD SOME SIXTH SENSE OR DOGS INTUITION TO TELL HER ALL WAS NOT WELL.
SUDDENLY THE CAR FLIPPED OFF THE TRUCK AND FELL ON ITS SIDE IMMOBILIZING THE TRUCK.
BUFFY WENT ARF-ARF AT US IN DOGS LANGUAGE SEEMING TO SAY THAT THE CAR AND TRUCK WERE STOLEN.
THE TRUCK DRIVER WAS STRUGLING TO GET AWAY. SEVERAL MEN RESTRAINED HIM ON THE GROUND.
THIS CRIME BUSTER WAS PARTIALLY BROUGHT ABOUT BY THE VIGILANCE INTUITION AND DOGS SIXTH SENSE OF THIS LITTLE PIECE OF FLUFF
SHE IS THE MIGHTY LITTLE MITE.....BUFFY THE BIJON FRIEZE'.
PEG-LEG---DAVIEYES
OH PEG-LEG WAS A MOUSY
THE COLOUR OF SNOW
ONE LEG WAS SHORTER
IT NEVER DID GROW.
HE AND I WERE SUCH LITTLE GUYS
AND SHORTER THAN TALL
HE CAPTURED THE HEARTS
DAVIEYES MUM ROBB......ALL.
HE WAS A GAME ONE
ON WHEEL OR THE SIDE
HE SOMETIMES WENT TOPWISE
AND CAME DOWN IN A GLIDE
ON THE SLIDE
ON HIS GOOD SIDE
OH PEG-LEG WAS A SMALL ONE
AND HE NEVER WOULD FIGHT
HE WOULD GUN UP TINY MOTORS
AND VANISH OF SIGHT
HE WENT TO OUR HANDS
AND SAID HE WAS THERE
BUT WANDERING AROUND
HE NEVER FELL NOT EVEN N'ER
HIS PEEP PEEP WAS A HOLLER
AND OTHERS TOOK NOTE
TO CAPTURE HIS MEANING
REPLIED AS BY ROTE
THE CAVERNS OF TIME
BORE HIS STRENGTH LOUD AND SHRILL
WAS HAPPY FOREVER
WHERE MICE HAVE THEIR FILL.
MY SICKNESS WAS A LONG ONE
AND NEVER CAME WELL
BUT PEG-LEG WAS MY SOUL-MATE
OUR FRIENDSHIP TIL THE BELL
*****MUD PUPPY DAYS AND NIGHTS.*****
A MUD PUPPY IS AN AMPHIBIAN POSSIBLY NAMED AFTER AN ANCIENT ANIMAL LIVING IN THE FRESH WATER MUDDY BOTTOM.
FULL GROWN IT IS 8 TO 10 INCHES IN LENGTH WITH 4 LEGS AND A TAIL
IT HAS GILLS FOR THE EXCHANGE OF OXYGEN AND CARBON DIOXIDE IN THE WATER.
THE MUD PUPPY HIBERNATES IN THE MUD IN WINTER.
THERE IS NO DOUBT IT IS SLOW MOVING.
BILL AND I DAVIEYES TOOK A SUMMER DAY WHEN WE WENT TO THE DEPRESSED LAKE CALLED "THE CREEK" IN OTTAWA CANADA.
THERE WAS A MUD PUPPY ON THE EDGE OF THE LAKE BREATHING HIS LAST.
WE PUT IT INTO A BUCKET OF WATER AND LUGGED IT BACK TO MY MOTHERS BASEMENT LAUNDRY SINK.
IT CAME TO LIFE FOR SEVERAL HOURS AND THEN SUDDENLY EXPIRED.
ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER TIME
AN ACTIVE MUCH MORE MOBILE MUD PUPPY SURFACED IN FRONT OF US.
IT BEAT A HASTY SUCCESSFUL RETREAT AS WE STRAINED FRUITLESSLY TO CAPTURE IT.
SMALL BOYS WANT TO CAPTURE ANYTHING THAT MOVES.
HOWEVER AFTER SOME THOUGHT WE DECIDED THAT ANIMALS ARE BEST IN THE WILD.
WE FELT ASHAMED OF WHAT WE PUT THE WILDLIFE THROUGH ESPECIALLY THE HUNDREDS IN OUR PARENTS HOUSES.
A PERFECT PERSON WOULD LIVE IN HARMONY WITH ALL LIVING CREATURES----WITH RESPECT!!!
GOALS AND ASPIRATIONS I AM, AND WANT TO BE SEEN AS, A PERSON WHO MAKES THINGS WORK OUT BETTER FOR PEOPLE.
THIS IS ONE OF MY CARDINAL RULES FOR LIVING AND ONE OF MY GREAT PERSONAL MOTIVATORS.
I AM A DEDICATED FACILITATOR FOR FAMILY, FRIENDS, THOSE IN NEED AND CO-WORKERS.
WRITTEN BY THE BROTHERS DAVIEYES & ROBBIEYES FOR DAVIEYES AND HIS OWN
LOVE WITHOUT CEASING___________________
YOURS ETERNALLY_____________ DAVIEYES AND ROBBIEYES
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